Friday, February 25, 2011

Better than Big Butter Jesus?

COLUMN NOTES: "Big Butter Jesus" is a reference to a song by Heywood Banks about the statue, known as the King of Kings Statue, pictured here to the left. It has since burned to the ground after being struck by lightning. You can hear Heywood's song at the end of this post.

HARBESON: Want to control Theatair X? Buy it

> SOUTHERN INDIANA — Last week, I wrote about Reclaim Our Culture Kentuckiana’s — or ROCK — continuing spat with Clarksville politicians in regards to Theatair X.

As I wrote, I knew I was reaching my word limit, but my mind kept saying, “Don’t stop; don’t stop.” So I didn’t. I have to say it feels good to write my first column series.

In part one, I said I didn’t think it was wise for ROCK to put faith in a secular man-made organization that uses the threat of violence and I now hope to help ROCK by suggesting other courses of action.

But first let’s get some clarity on ROCK’s accusation of possible corruption in Clarksville government. ROCK’s president implied that Theatair X might be paying off the town of Clarksville. Well, of course they are. We just give a special name to this sort of extortion: property taxes.

Now that we’ve shined the light of truth on that, let’s take a peep into two possible alternatives for ROCK proponents to use instead of trying so hard to get in bed with government.

The first suggestion: follow the Golden Rule. I realize this can be an abstract theoretical phrase so let’s find a real life example, a model of the behavior the rule encourages. I suggest we use Theatair X.

Theatair X clearly lives by the Golden Rule. This business just quietly goes about meeting a market demand without initiating force on anyone. Theatair X never asks government to control what other people do on their private property.

Theatair X respects everyone’s right to self-ownership and does not force anyone to enter their establishment. Theatair X doesn’t put photos up of people who dislike what they do. They just leave them alone to pursue their lives as they see fit.

Theatair X shows us it is possible to peacefully co-exist with those who have different values. They understand they are doing no harm to anyone’s children. Heck, most of us know from experience that children are way more likely to see real live sex at home. Lock your bedroom doors, parents.

Now, I understand that just leaving this business alone still might be difficult. For some, the desire for control can just be so, well, tempting. So let me offer another idea that perfectly fits those with this strong need for control.

Buy the place. Ownership is really the only way to control what happens on a piece of property. Make them an offer. Everyone has a price.

Sure, it might be expensive but I think if anyone has the chance of doing it, it’s ROCK because they have the backing of churches. See, churches don’t have to hand over the government extortion fee — property tax — that businesses do, so the potential pool of money is even greater.

If ROCK persuades all the local religious organizations not to buy property or build until they have enough money to purchase Theatair X’s property, they could finally have control of that area.

This could be better than the King of Kings, Big Butter Jesus!

Yeah, I know it will be more difficult due to ROCK’s work assisting governments in Louisville and Southern Indiana. They have succeeded in effectively decreasing Theatair X’s competition, making their business worth even more. Oh, if only they hadn’t participated in government force.

I hope ROCK, along with everyone else who is interested, will focus all their energy on using peaceful voluntary means to get what they want. Because that kind of action is what really gets me hot.

And speaking of hot!:

Sellersburg resident Debbie Harbeson isn’t sure what could top Big Butter Jesus, but she and Heywood Banks are sure excited to find out.

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